


Apologize

by impilusa



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Accident, M/M, Sebaek - Freeform, Soulmates, biker baekhyun, doctor sehun, hunbaek
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-17
Updated: 2018-11-17
Packaged: 2019-08-25 03:22:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,715
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16653328
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/impilusa/pseuds/impilusa
Summary: After their relationships worst fight ever, everything seems that it was too late to apologize.





	Apologize

**Author's Note:**

> So this is a translation of my original work in spanish, I'm not actually a native english speaker so have mercy on me! Thank you for reading

Sehun didn’t even know why they were arguing this time. He felt detuned from his own body, like watching the scene in third person at the same time that he was yelling to Baekhyun things that he didn’t really wanted to say. Baekhyun answered back even more furious, poisoning his words, the situation taking both of them to the point that they were just screaming without knowing what the other was saying.

The thunderstorm wasn’t of any help either, the lights left their auras shine more because of the anger consuming them, the furious grips that would left some bruises, the burning tears that slided by their cheeks; everything was killing at low fire, and they wouldn’t make it til’ tomorrow. Sehun knew it really inside of his soul, so much that it was ripping himself with every time he took a cold breath.

To tell the truth, there was no more good things floating between them, and it seemed like all those good things just got hidden behind a dark wall, because no positive argument filtrated in their conversation to try to save what they had.

“If we were soulmates, this wouldn’t have happened”, argued Baekhyun. It looked like he didn’t wanted to save anything between them. “But we aren’t, so just stop pretending…!".

And suddenly, silence. Baekhyun didn’t finished his sentence. The screamings just stopped, and they just did eye contact in the semi-darkness.

It would be a lie if we say that those words didn’t ripped Sehun’s heart in two. It would be the biggest lie in his life denying it.

“I’m leaving”, said Baekhyun in a lower voice, getting himself free using all his strength from the grip that Sehun had in his wrist. “I’m leaving, I’m leaving, I can’t stand this anymore. We aren’t any good to each other. There is no future for us”.

Sehun’s lower lip did actually shake while he processed the other’s words, who was already getting dressed up.

“W-what?”.

Baekhyun didn’t stopped to answer him and continued putting some of his clothes in a little bag.

“I’ll go to a friend’s place. Don’t look out for me. We need some time to get everything clear, ok?”. He clicked his tongue, jaded. Sehun could still look at the wet marks on his cheeks with every thunder that lightened the room. “I’m so sorry that things had to end up light this, but I can’t stand this anymore, Sehun… it’s always the same”.

Sehun swallowed all his arguments and crossed his arms on his chest, giving his back to Baekhyun at the same time. The apartment was cold, over frozen now that the heat from the fight dissipated and all that was left were the tears and the impotence tremor.

“I’ll call you in a few days” mumbled Baekhyun.

“Don’t do it, I don’t want to know anymore about you from now on” hissed Sehun, watching Baekhyun’s image over the window’s reflection. “As you said, we aren’t soulmates so all of this will be worthless at some point of our lives”.

Sehun wanted to apologize immediately when he saw Baekhyun’s face going into pieces just right behind him, but it was too late, more than late to apologize because Baekhyun just left and Sehun’s pride was bigger than him… so he left his now ex-boyfriend leave the place with the rain, something dangerous and a reason why he wouldn’t have ever let him go in any other circumstance.

He bite his lower lip while he moved to the window. He looked outside and saw Baekhyun starting angrily his bike, losing him from his gaze at the end of the dark road. The street lights said goodbye to him, and maybe it was their “forever” getting away at the same speed that Baekhyun did.

When the silence of the apartment overwhelmed him, Sehun started crying in front of his broken reflection in the window. He cried as he never did before. Deep inside, he didn’t give a shit if Baekhyun wasn’t his soulmate, if their thread never appeared in their respectives little fingers, because he felt long ago in love with Baekhyun and even if someone told him that the person at the other side of his own thread was willing to have a chance with Sehun, he would never stop loving Byun Baekhyun as much as he did. In his mind and heart he would never give a place to anybody but Baekhyun.

But of course Baekhyun would never understand it. Baekhyun always thought that every relationship with someone who wasn’t his soulmate at some point would come to an end and it was actually true: but probably only because of Baekhyun’s fault. Sehun started to realize how Baekhyun began to put some distance between them at the moment that their relationship turned into something more serious, right after the night Sehun told him about his dream of having a family, and even if he saw Baekhyun trying to fight with his own demons to keep everything alright between them, Baekhyun started to tighten things almost unconsciously to culminate in a bad end for both of them.

And he reached his goal, the hell he did. He cut every thread they would have had, and also cut in the middle the ribbon that hold Sehun’s heart in one piece.

 

 

***

 

The room was empty.

Baekhyun didn’t came back a few hours later as he did usually, and Sehun didn’t tried to contact with him either.

The bed was empty, too.

But the younger one scent still persisted in the ambient.

Sehun didn’t know if he was ever going to have the opportunity to apologize for saying such horrible things that he didn’t actually felt, because he didn’t ever thought the same as Baekhyun. He believed that even without being soulmates, they could end up destined together. Where was written that they were gonna end up with the person at the other side of the thread? Why wasting their lives thinking about it, and not living it?

Anyways, maybe he would never do it.

Baekhyun was gone, and how was he going to apologize with him?

He took a napkin and wrote something that was willing to send on a text but his phone off reminded him that it was a stupid thing to do.

“I know it’s late and there isn’t a thread that connect us, but come home, Baekhyun. I’m so sorry… come back. We will fix it. I love you”.

The clock said it was 04:54 AM.

He left the pen fall, and it rolled on the floor.

With the running of the needles, Sehun felt that it was getting even more and more late.

Tic, toc.

His time just passed off.

 

***

 

 

Getting on without Baekhyun seemed like pure torture, and only just after four days passed their break up, he put his pants on and decided to get himself ready to work.

There was a little detail about it: since the moment he woke up that afternoon, more specifically about his life and destiny. Anyways, Sehun decided to just ignore the read thread tied to his little finger as it just didn’t existed. Of course, no one beside him and the person at the other extreme could see it, so it wasn’t actually difficult for him pretending that nothing was happening, even if it was no one in front of him to pretend.

He just wanted to lie to himself as long as he could. 

He woke up of the four-days-empty bed and he made it. After it, he showered, got dressed up, accommodated his shirt in front of the mirror of the entrance and then went to the hospital with his black car, watching the night’s darkness swallowing everything around him at the same time the sun got hidden in the horizon. It was a cold fall and it was merely raining, the picture looked really melancholic and it wasn’t of any help for his mood.

Registering his entrance at the hospital, Sehun started to greet everyone around with his blank expression. He opted for the night shift because there was almost no one in his area and it was really helpful for his task of avoiding everyone that would have might got worried about his absence the last days and also, at that time visitors already had to leave and the rough and tumble activity was all centrated at the Emergency Room. That’s why it didn’t take much time for Sehun to arrive to his office and he didn’t have to explain himself to anyone. 

Once there, keeping his blank usual expression, he put on his white coat and the badge with his name on his pocket, accommodated his long sight glasses, took his things from the office and started his night shift. 

The thread was annoying, he wouldn’t deny it. He was trying not to stare at it while he was talking to his patients, but the supernatural shining distracted him anyways. Sehun had been waiting his whole fucking for it to appear around his little finger, because it was supposed to show up the exact same day that he was going to meet his soulmate. But, truth be told, he had been wishing for a long time for it to appear around Baekhyun’s little finger since the day he met him, even if it did never happened. From that time on, he never hoped for it to appear again, because if it showed up was going to be connected to someone that wasn’t Baekhyun.

And now that he bitterly got separated from that person that always secretly dreamed to be destined to, the fucking thread appeared. It was clearly a reminder that they would never work together, or maybe of the fucking failure they were.

Sincerely, the fucking destiny would have never picked up a worst day to make him meet his soulmate.

He felt flustered and he barely contained his anger at the time he abandoned the last room of his patrol. He knew that if he was feeling like that, his feelings wouldn’t allow him to work politely, so he stood in the middle of the hallway and left some tears escape from his eyes without even giving a permission.

Since he opened his eyes that noon he had this horrible feeling pressing his chest and it wasn’t actually because of the displeasure that the thread gave to him, but because of the feelings that came from the other extreme: it did not transmit anything good to him, and it didn’t allowed him to think straight. Apart from it, it wasn’t of any help the fact that Baekhyun’s face came to his mind every time he stopped to think about it.

What would Baekhyun say if he called him and said that he finally got the chance to see the red thread in his little finger? In his mind, Baekhyun’s worst version would say “I told you, we weren’t destined and it was obvious that our relationship would have ended anyways”. But he actually knew that his ex−boyfriend would have said something like “I’m so happy for you, Oh Sehun…”. So painful as it sounded like, it was something that his ex would say. And thinking about it made him hate the fucking thread even more, because it determined a destiny where Baekhyun wasn’t by his side.

He wished to rip it off, cut it, step on it, but he couldn’t even touch it and it just made him more angry, plus the angst tears running by down his cheeks and the impotence of the fact that he couldn’t have back the person he loved the most.

He knew it was too late to fix a broken heart, and also, Baekhyun would even want to fix up things between them? Being totally coherents about it, the thread was just a constant reminder that everything had ended up for both of them, because that day Sehun was going to met his soulmate even if he tried to avoid it, and his life probably was going to take a 180° turn and he wasn’t even sure of wanting it to happen.

Releasing a sigh, he recovered himself and put his shit together. Sehun cleared the wetness from his cheeks and decided to end his night round. But even before he could take a step, a nurse came from the hallway just from the same direction that his thread disappeared on the floor, and it freaked the hell out of him that his soulmate could be her, but he fastly saw that she didn’t had a thread around his finger.

“Doctor Oh, there is a new patient at the 4b” she said, stepping in front of him. “Doctor Wu asked me to tell you. He already finished his patrol half an hour early and he did not checked him. They put him right when you started your round”.

“I’ll do it immediately, thank you” Sehun said, taking the datasheet she gave to him.

“You’re welcome. Good night”. She bowed and passed him off. “Ah, I forgot, Doctor Oh”.

Sehun had already started to walt, but he stopped and turned to see her. “Yes?”.

“Last night I heard that they called you from the Emergency Room for a surgery and you didn’t answer. Did something happened to you?”.

“My phone was out of battery”, he lied. He turned it off since the night Baekhyun left to not do something really stupid.

She nodded and then bowed again, leaving him this time alone. Sehun watched her since she disappeared inside a room.

Biting the top of his pen, the tall doctor readed the datasheet at the same time he started to walk to the 4B room at the turn of the hallway. There wasn’t a name on it, because probably the doctors didn’t find any information about the unconscious patient. The person entered the hospital almost four days ago. He had been in intensive therapy for three days because of the severe damage in his body. The bike accident he had was serious, but nothing unusual to Sehun. He was tired of seeing injured patients because of those kind of accidents. He always told Baekhyun not to drive that hell’s machine, but his boyfriend never listened to him.

No family contacts and with some scratches in his body, four broken ribs, a little fracture in a vertebra. It was most because of that vertebra that the patient had to stay in the hospital for a pretty long time. 

He opened the door after knocking twice while he still looked at the datasheet of the young patient. Almost every space at the sheet was empty beside of the time of the accident, that was around of five AM. For some reason he couldn’t stop looking at all those data. He was thinking that he was awake at that same time thinking that his life was going away from his hands and that person actually was suffering it in the real meaning of the words. Life was really ironic sometimes.

“Good night”, he mumbled as he entered the room, finally gazing at the bed in the semi-darkness to see his patient.

His soul just fell to his foot, and he felt frozen because of the picture he obtained.

The patient was laying half sit on the bed, with both hands over the sheets. Time just stopped as Sehun gazed the man, or better say younger boy with only twenty four years, a half-destroyed face and full of wounds, a bandage on his head letting some black strands of hair free over his head, a nasal cannula and a sickly skin tone.

And plus, it was this tiny detail of a thread tied to his little finger, red and bright; the same extreme of the thread that Sehun wanted to pretend that didn’t exist since he woke up two hours ago.

He bit the palm of his hand in frustration, feeling the weakness in his legs, and he fell on his knees beside the bed.

Sehun took his little BaekHyun’s hand and cried, cried until he had nothing more to release than the fucking frustration, the anger and regretting that have been eating him from inside all those past days. He almost lost his soulmate and he wouldn’t have even know.

All those bad vibes finally left with the tears, letting free way to the relief of knowing that the man was alright and also was his soulmate.

Baekhyun was his destiny. He was so afraid of his soulmate being someone else than Baekhyun, but now that he saw the the thread that connected them, it felt so good and also it was so perfect that he couldn’t breath good. He loved Baekhyun so much that he felt his whole body in pain just because of the thought that he could may actually have been destined to somebody different, but it wasn’t that way and now he had a new opportunity to fix things between them.

Destiny wasn’t so bad after all.

“I love you so much, and I promise you that I’ll fix everything between us” he whispered, feeling more calm and giving some soft caress in Baekhyun’s hand as he stared at the red thread in his delicate little finger. “I will never let you go again, I won’t allow it”.

“Sehun…” mumbled BaekHyun, his voice sounded weak and hoarsely, something that shock Sehun, taking him by surprise.

But he immediately felt happy that Baekhyun was conscious. With tears in his eyes, Sehun sat on the bet and locked his eyes with Baekhyun. Even if the younger man looked disorientated, he recognized Sehun perfectly.

“Hey, love. I’m here” answered Sehun, caressing Baekhyun’s cheek, the one that didn’t actually have a lot of bruises.

The mentioned one smiled slowly, closing barely his eyes to the contact. Sehun started right after to check all his vital signs, his pupil’s reaction, but everything seemed in perfect order. He filled the datasheet with Baekhyun’s info after that and then took the glass of water over the little table beside the bed, helping Baekhyun to drink with little sips.

Baekhyun stared at him all the time Sehun got himself busy doing that stuff. Sehun didn’t wanted to overwhelm him, he didn’t even know how to act right now. He forgot about being a doctor, now he was just a worried boyfriend, a man that wanted to take care at all costs of his love. He wanted also to apologize in that exact moment, ask for a forgiven for everything he made, but he couldn’t because Baekhyun was really weak and it wasn’t correct to do it even if he wished it so bad.

Every time his eyes vagued on his wounds, the doctor tried not to think on what would have happened to him if Baekhyun wouldn’t have made it through, because his chest felt tightened and he wanted to die. But the relief of Baekhyun being actually fine calmed him. 

“You… didn’t got… my message?” asked Baekhyun after a long time that Sehun gave little caress in every extension of healthy skin he saw, checking that Baekhyun was his soulmate and was actually there with him, alive.

“No, I’m sorry… I turned off my phone”.

Sadness passed by Baekhyun’s brown eyes, but he immediately lower them so Sehun couldn’t see the disappointment in them. But it was too late, Sehun already saw it.

He decided to pleasure Baekhyun. With the curiosity scratching his palms in the middle of the uncomfortable and silent moment, Sehun started to search for his phone with his right hand til’ he found it in the back pocket of his jeans. Releasing a sight, he left it charge when he turned it on and gave back his gaze to Baekhyun’s.

Baekhyun was staring at him with a indescifrable expression, and it was a lot to say because in their two years of relationship Sehun thought that he knew every one of Baekhyun’s expressions: since his first joy that time Baekhyun asked him to be his boyfriend and he said yes, the pleasure painting his features when they made love, the anger when they got into fights, the sadness when they hurt each other, the melancholy of their broke ups, the anhelation, desire, love; he saw many, but Sehun never saw this one because indeed, Baekhyun was showing it for the first time in his life.

The motive behind it was that the younger actually saw the thread in their hands, that one that connected each other forever, and that was why that gaze was so strange to Sehun even if he was the first of them to make it when he realized that Baekhyun was the person at the other extreme of the ribborn a few minutes earlier.

Before he even could realize it, his phone started ringing five times in a row. But he didn’t checked it immediately, no, he just hanged in the silence when they locked their eyes together again.

“I’m so sorry, Baekhyun” he said suddenly, realising all the air in his lungs, he couldn’t hold it anymore. “I’m so sorry for what I said, I would never want this to end. And thinking that I could have actually lost you by now…”.

Baekhyun shook his head.

“Read it”, he ordered even with his weak voice.

Sehun rushed to open his phone, entering right to his messages. There was a message from the night Baekhyun left. And after reading it, Sehun knew that it didn’t even matter if there was a ribbon tied to his little finger to know that Baekhyun has been forever the person that he was destined to be with.

“Kiss me” whispered Baekhyun when Sehun started to cry after reading the message.

Sehun leaned to him with a huge smile even if he was still crying. And, noticing the tears in Baekhyun’s cheek, he kissed him softly, transmitting all that happiness he felt, because after all, it seemed like the universe had given him a chance.

It wasn’t too late to apologize.

 

[04:54 AM] Baekhyun:

I’m sorry, Sehun. I know it’s late, but I’m coming home. With or without thread, I want to spend my life with you. We’ll fix it. I love you”.


End file.
